The power of fears

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.” ― Helen Keller

I don’t think we talk enough about our fears. Probably because what we fear is daunting and sometimes embarrassing and almost always overwhelming.

But more than that, I think we’ve been taught to ignore the fact that we’re afraid. Because fear has become synonymous with weakness. And it’s gotten to a point where it seems like we’re afraid to even admit that we’re afraid.

The more I’ve thought about fear, the more I’ve come to understand that life isn’t about being fearless. It’s not about reaching a place where we’ve somehow figured out how to conquer everything we’re afraid of.

Life is about being afraid and doing it anyway.

Because we have to. Because, in some cases, the only thing we have left is faith that things are going to be okay even though we’re absolutely terrified.

The people who believe that we shouldn’t fear anything will probably say I’m doing it wrong. That fear is sabotaging me, preventing me from being successful. Maybe they’re right.

But I’d rather acknowledge I’m afraid and do my best to go on living my life than falsely represent myself as some fearless godlike robot walking around in a human costume conquering everything in my path.

Fearing success

“Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” — Winston Churchill

Often, we fear success because we fear the risk that is necessary to achieve the success. We fear being judged if we fail rather than considering what we could learn from the failure to apply towards success. We believe the stories of overnight success, without realizing that overnight success follows years of hard work, effort, and failures.

We each need to define what success is. We need to know what it looks like. And this is personal, success means something different to each of us. Making this a clear goal, allows each of us to move towards success, without concern of what others think. Defining what success means to each of us makes it less frightening and more achievable.

The fear of success is real and holds many people back. However, what we need to understand is that success is never an accident. Instead of letting the past hold us back, it is time to let go of it. We have to do the work. We have to accept the challenges. And we have to prepare for the inevitable (and positive) changes that come with success.

The fear of taking risks never goes away (feel the fear and do it anyway)

Risk is all around us. Life is a series of calculated risks. Everything you decide to do has a margin of risk. No outcome is ever 100 percent certain but it pays to calculated risks to advance your life and career.

“Fortune favors the brave."

The biggest risk is not taking any risk at all. Geena Davis notes “If you risk nothing, then you risk everything.”
He who risks and fails is better than he who decides to do nothing.
Playing it safe is comfortable. It makes you feel in control. It gives you a sense of security. But it kills your creativity.

There are two kinds of people:
- Those who take risks and explore opportunities to make a dent in the universe. Those who see failure as an option and embrace every obstacle as the way forward.
- And those who take pride in security. Those who seek stability, affiliation, comfort, work worth doing and the assurance it will be okay.
The world needs and rewards both.

But stability does not guarantee fulfillment. If you want to create meaningful work, your only choice is to embrace risk and work with it.

Goethe once said, “The dangers of life are infinite, and among them is safety.”

There is never a perfect time for you to take action.

There is never a perfect time for you to launch a project, an idea or show your work. The timing will never be perfect for you to write a book, change your habit, or embrace a new habit.
Once you acknowledge this, you will get a lot more meaningful work done every day.

No matter how many chances you take in life, you will still feel the fear every time you take on a new project, pursue meaningful work or start something new. The good new is that the fear becomes familiar. You get used to it. And it doesn’t stop you from making a change.

Denis Waitley says “Life is inherently risky. There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing.”

Taking risks is how you become better at what you do

In her book, Stop Playing Safe: Rethink Risk, Unlock the Power of Courage, Achieve Outstanding Success, author Margie Warrell says pursuing a bigger purpose in your life will demand fearing regret more than failure. Margie writes:

“Embracing risk is key to succeeding in the bigger game of life. Those who lose aren’t those who have dared greatly and fallen short of the mark. They are those who played so safe that they never lived at all.”

You must embrace some level of discomfort if you want to create interesting work. If you want to make a dent, the risk is not the enemy.

The first step is to take one

Many people don’t trust themselves enough to take a step into the unknown.
But everything is unknown until you try.

You can be as big and successful as you can possibly imagine if you build that mindset you need to step outside the safe zone and still feel comfortable. As Rachel Cohn said:“The reward is in the risk.” 

Everything you do has two possible outcomes: Either it works or it doesn’t. Being able to live with the possibility of either is essential if you are going to move forward in life.

Don’t think too far into the future when you decide to take action. Use what you have right now and take that calculated risk to advance your work.

“There are risks and costs to action. But they are far less than the long range risks of comfortable inaction.” — John F. Kennedy

Dance with fear without being destroyed by it

Start believing in yourself and stop waiting for some manifestation of bravery, it won’t come. Bravery is forged in the doing of what scares you the most.

Everything you want is on the otherside of fear. Overcome fear. Courage is the power of the mind to overcome fear.

Don’t be afraid to fail. Sometimes it’s because you did the right thing. Sometimes it’s just senseless. But it’s always something we humans will have in common. We’re not really here to watch our own backs but to look out for each other.